You have to know that when you are dating a Victoria’s Secret model, especially one as hot as Miranda Kerr, that you have to maintain a certain sense of decorum. In fact, it wouldn’t hurt to go the extra mile to look fine for your girl. But this concept seems to be a little lost on Orlando Bloom who not only can’t go that extra mile, but he is even having trouble with basic personal hygiene. Orlando is now back with his on-again off-again girlfriend Miranda, and we may know now why the relationship has been more off-again than anything. Miranda’s biggest complaint is that Orlando is ‘too smelly’ and not in the Kenneth Cole Reaction kind of way. She’s actually had to ask him t shower more often, and to wash his clothes a little more. He’s been known to wear the same jeans for a week before tossing them in the wash, and it’s not just his jeans, but all his clothes. To make matters worse, he sleeps with his dog which I am sure doesn’t add much to his morning fresh face. So Miranda is putting her foot down about cleaning up a little, and the word is that he’s ‘trying’. Trying? How much effort does one need for a shower or to toss a load of laundry in? Isn’t it funny how your impression changes of celebs when you find these things out? I look at him and kind of want to just go ewww…..I can only imagine how grossed out Miranda must be.

Source: Star Magazine

That’s the new lingo beig used by bitter old hags that have way too many divorces under their belts. Why be called a divorcee when you can have the soft title of annulee? Wow, I’m single, but I’d much rather be annuled. Does that mean I’m two steps away from being dubbed a “Lady” by the Queen? According to reports, Pamela Anderson filed for an annulment of her marriage to hubbie of what… a few months, Rick Salomon. The reason cited was FRAUD! I have no clue what he could be swindling from her, but I’d guess it’s the secret to her youthful appearance. Oh wait a minute, what am I talking about? She lost that years ago! Then it must be the secret of how you can stretch and then restretch skin around numerous different pairs and sizes of silicone breast implants.

Now I’ve truely seen everything… canary yellow underpants that scream Fruit of the Loom 6 pack! But, are being hailed part of a “RETRO” bikini. OK, fair enough, they’re not marketing it as a bikini, but rather a bathing suit. I’d be totally embarrassed sportin’ it since you know everyone’s wondering, what IS she hiding in there? Oh, nothing much, just my cell, pack of smokes, chihuahua and a 6-pack of Corona. Here are some more pics from the March 2008 issue of Allure Magazine. It’s a totally fab magazine with plenty of make-up tips and of course, hints on the latest Spring fashion trends. I LOVE it! Ooh, on a side note… doesn’t she look a little like Shannon Doherty from Beverly Hills 90210 in the middle shot?

Well now, I guess they allow in-mates, I mean guests, to frequent local discount box stores for some social engagement and easing back into public for some normalicy. First step Target, second step sobriety. I mean who knows what it’s like @ Cirque Lodge in Utah?

In terms of why Kiki’s @ Cirque Lodge:

A regular on the L.A. nightlife scene, sources say Dunst wanted to slow down and take a breather from partying. According to a friend, effects from her childhood stardom and media scrutiny also played a role, saying “Everyone has problems, but not everyone is forced to deal with them in a fishbowl.” ~ People

I’m guessing it’s kinda a mix between the insane asylum in 12 Monkeys and the toyland from Drew Barrymore and actor Keanu Reeves’ classic movie Babes in Toyland. I’m glad that the mystery has now been solved about where she bought her awesome sunglasses. No, all bitchiness aside, I DO like Kirsten, think she’s pretty OK, and hope that she figures everything out at her own pace. I mean Walmart can be fun too, if you’re on enough valium and Xanax… it’s so huge that you can really get lost in the aisles and end up buying all sorts of crap that you don’t need!

Source: People

I never thought I’d see one of those ballet dancing hippos from Walt Disney’s Fantasia practicing on the beach in LA or Miami!? Well, here you have it, Brooke Hogan doing a photo shoot in a powder blue and white bikini that is soooo em, feminine… ya, not masculine @ all! Well, even if we’re not buying what she’s selling, it appears that her BF is! Dude can’t keep his eyes off her chunktastic figure. The good news is that if modelling or singing doesn’t pan out, she’ll always have an in in the WWE.

Jennifer Aniston has a Hot New BF!! Bitten & Bound
Aaron Carter Caught with 2 oz. of Weed Fatback and Collards
Paris Hilton is Dating Benji Madden Seriously? OMG! WTF?
Is Mischa Barton Going to Jail? Allie is Wired
Natalie Portman Looks Stinky and Grubby Webster’s is My Bitch
Britney Spears’ Forehead is PEELING! Just Jared
Mariah Carey Plays on the Beach Celebrity Dog Watcher
Kelly Osbourne is Super Thin… Looks Fab! The Skinny Website

Oh yes, Spring collections are being released now as we speak!!!! Here’s Kate Moss sporting a totally fabulous & posh Hermès Birkin Bag that’s PERFECT for the Spring in London, UK. She’s leaving the pub/restaurant in Primrose Hills with her musician BF Jamie Hince, who’s definitely an upgrade in the hygiene department from ex-BF Pete Doherty. Rumour has it that this supermodel has changed her diet in the hopes of improving her fertility. It seems like mommyitis has struck on the other side of the pond, too.

Pacific Coast News

Again? The scratches on her arms seem to tell the story. But, isn’t Blake still in jail? So then it couldn’t be an early morning hotel room brawl and blitzed out 3am stoned walk through the empty streets. OK, so, what happened? I hope she didn’t do it to herself, although that’s definitely a possibility; smoking crack can do that to you, so I’ve heard. Maybe she thought she was an orange and what fending off people trying to peel her? Or, maybe she just woke up one afternoon and found them there. Amy: “Bonus! i got more than just the tattoo i paid for”. Yes, yes you did. Don’t worry Amy, I’m sure Blaaaaaakey will lick your wounds for you when he gets out of jail.