Wasn’t it just yesterday we were talking about how sad it was that Jessica Simpsons ex husband and first time lover Nick Lachey was engaged to Vanessa DeMinnillo? Scrolling back, no, it wasn’t yesterday, but it was only last week. Well, to prove to him and the world that she’s not a pathetic divorcee waiting to find love again, Jessica Simpson went out and got engaged. That oughtta show that Nick Lachey! At least she waited a whole five minutes after the announcement of Nick’s engagement to do so. Anything sooner would have been just…well…mortifying. Sure, six months is a little speedy for Jessica Simpson to have gotten engaged to her retired football star, Eric Johnson. But by 30, you really know what kind of man you want: anyone. But since nothing can ever go smoothly for Jessica, much less a marriage proposal, the Jessica blabs at Us Weekly are raising their eyebrows over Eric’s true intentions. Our friend “Close Source” has the goods on this one.

“Eric doesn’t have a job, he just follows her around. Her friends do not trust him.”

It’s rumoured that Jessica’s hairdresser and best friend forever Ken Paves cut the forever short when she started dating Eric because he didn’t approve. “Ken is sick of her cycle of dumping friends when she’s with a guy,” Close Source told Us. Ken later insisted they’re still buds, but we’ll see where he winds up in the wedding hierarchy: bridal party or hair and makeup. Meanwhile, Jessica’s dad Joe has tweeted his congratulations to Jessica. “So very happy for Jess and Eric,” he wrote. “May they have a lifetime of joy and happiness.” A lifetime is a very admirable goal. I’m going a little more realistic with, “May you actually make it to the altar and then stay married for a bit afterwards.”

Photograph: © PacificCoastNews.com *

Ah yes, the ever so handsome Cyrus couple, spotted at their last public outing at the Los Angeles premiere of “The Last Song” held at the ARcLight Cinemas in Hollywood this year. Who would have thought that just months later Billy Ray would no longer have a trophy wife to call his own. By some reports, the divorce scandal that has hit headlines and cast a shadow over Miley Cyrus’s pretty young face, is all Billy Ray’s fault. We aren’t talking Tiger Woods or Jesse James status though, by the looks of it, though it isn’t fabulous news, the Cyrus split is about as tame as Hollywood splits come. Sort of. The Cyruses knew their marriage was over when Billy Ray tried to achy-break the bedroom door down. The final fight between Billy, 49, and Tish, 43, his wife of 18 years, started because Billy had grounded their 17-year-old junior badass Miley, and Tish let her just run around town anyway. And Billy Ray will not have the discipline in his family be trite and meaningless. This is not a California courtroom! Tish went and locked herself in the bedroom, and that’s when things got horrible. “Billy screamed terrible things at Tish,” a source told the National Enquirer.

“He accused her of having affairs, including one with Bret Michaels. He screamed that she was a bad parent. Then he started kicking in the door.”

The couple fought so viciously that a nanny had to take their 10-year-old daughter Noah away, preventing any more trauma that would only manifest itself later through questionable fashion. Tish apparently made things very clear….

“You’re making me f–king crazy, Billy Ray. Go back to Tennessee, all you ever do is make everybody miserable!”

Andddddd he did. He’s been staying at their 500-acre ranch outside Nashville while Tish is sticking it out in L.A., managing Miley’s career. Miley’s hoping they can all get together for a beach vacation when she turns 18 on November 23 buttt we’ll see. Just because Miley is becoming an adult doesn’t mean her parents are.

Photograph: © Tuukka Jantti, PacificCoastNews.com

Struggling to erase that scarlet letter off her forehead, it sounds like LeAnn Rimes will be living in sin no more. Well, less sin. She’s engaged to her boyfriend of over a year, Dean Cibrian, a source tells E!. See ladies–he WILL leave his wife for you! They didn’t get engaged over Halloween, when Eddie posted a pic on Twitter of himself on bended knee in front of a wagon reading “White Chapel Asylum” with “lunatic” written across it in blood. Leann wrote on Twitter the next day that they “were having a little fun.” Of course that was just for fun! The blood-splattered messages at their wedding will be done in calligraphy. Before this news came out, the woman Eddie left for LeAnn, his ex-wife Brandi Glanville, told that new View-copy The Talk on Thursday she wants to have a face-to-face with Leann. Brandi was shocked when Eddie and Leann were busted having an affair last year after filming the Nora Roberts TV movie Northern Lights. “My marriage–in my head–was not in trouble,” she said. Well, it’s probably best Brandi and Leann get everything out on the table now, so Leann knows what to expect when the priest says, “Speak now or forever hold your piece.” Just to get through her pilates, Brandi has been driven to drink three or four glasses of wine per day. She was then busted for DUI last week. She says loneliness has led her to this tragic new tipsy lifestyle. In light of this reported engagement, I expect Brandi will be spending the night leaning on her dear friend Maria Christina, either that or leaning over her dear friend the porcelain god in the loo. Breakups suck, she’lll get over it. But LeAnn and Dean, congratulations. We wish you all the best until you…cheat on each other as well. Come on now….two cheaters getting engaged? What do YOU think is going to happen. We expect to announce their arrival in splitsville in 2-5. Stay tuned.

Photograph: PacificCoastNews.com

And here we see Denise Richards and her gorgeous daughters Sam and Lola participating in the Best Friends Animal Society Adop-tion event at the La Brea Tar Pits in Los Angeles this week. And by all looks and accounts, she is not just looking but acting the model mom for her darling daughters. After following her through “It’s Complicated” we learned a little more about Denise Richards, and her relationship with former husband Charlie Sheen. Now that Charlie Sheen has hit the headlines again with his crazier than crazy antics, Denise Richards is proving to the world how to be a big name in Hollywood, and still maintain the dignity and grace that every divorce deserves. Yes she is quite the model mom and ex-wife, contrary to her frequent criticism. What many people do not know however is that Denise Richards is in fact tied to the latest Charlie Sheen scandal, but she would rather maintain her class and just….not discuss it at all. Who can blame her? But Charlie may want to show some gratitude there, maybe even by forking over one of his $825,000 cheques from a Two And A Half Men to Denise Richards. His ex-wife and mother of his daughters Sam, 6, and Lola, 5, turned down over a million dollars to tell her side of what happened on that colourful night when police broke up Charlie’s naked, frothing, porn-star-terrorizing hotel party. “She has turned down Oprah and lots of other media offers that want her to reveal the truth,” a source tells PopEater. Denise and her daughters were staying on the same floor as Charlie at the Plaza Hotel during his freak out. She made it to Howard Stern as part of a pre-booked publicity push for her new Spike TV series Blue Mountain State, but would only say, “it’s been a very eventful trip.” Well, they did see Mary Poppins. Has Denise Richards been abducted and replaced by an alien? This is not the same woman who dragged her kids to a million celebrity photo opps and made them hug her for the cameras on her reality show It’s Complicated. “I have a lot of faith in my ex,” she told the Today show in the wake of Charlie’s meltdown. That’s a lot of patience towards a man who, for example, brought a porn star to dinner and wielded a knife to his wife on Christmas Day. We like the new Denise and even think we are starting to have some respect for this alien!

Photograph: Jeff Steinberg/Juan Sharma, © PacificCoastNews.com

We are seeing Lily Allen dressing down for her final performance at the Big Chill Festival before she put a kibosh on her career to be a mom for a little while and announced a five year break from music. Dressed in comfy pants, kooshy flat sneaks, and an oversized flannel top that doesn’t do much to hide her growing mummy tummy, Lily is in all her pregnant glory. And we can see just how darling and cute she looks as a mommy to be, and she is glowing with the pending happiness of motherhood as well. But, sadly enough, we have to report that this glow and this shine and this happiness we’ve been waiting for Lily for so long, has come to an end…at least for now. The 25-year-old singer lost her unborn child six months into the pregnancy last week, and was rushed back into hospital on Friday suffering from septicaemia, a form of blood poisoning. It started with the miscarriage, where she was rushed to the hospital, and she ended up back there just a few days later to find this pregnancy is sadly ending with some fairly serious health problems for Lily. Her publicist provided this official statement to The Sun:

“Lily Allen is back in hospital, where she is being treated for septicaemia. She is responding well to treatment and her condition continues to improve. Lily thanks everyone for their messages of support and again asks that she and partner Sam Cooper be left alone whilst she recovers.”

This is not the first time Lily has experienced this pain, in 2008 she lost a baby at four months and lost the relationship she was in simultaneously. We do know that she and Sam Cooper are stronger than ever relationship wise, and are glad to hear she has some tremendous support during this terrible time. Our thoughts and prayers of healing and strength go to Lily Allen and Sam Cooper at this time. We EAGERLY await good news and smiles for Lily as soon as she is feeling better, and on the mend. We love you Lily!

Photograph: © Robert Craft, PacificCoastNews.com

Well if these two weren’t the fakest couple in Hollywood then I don’t know who is. You almost want to say they deserve an award of some sort for being such big fakers, but…who wants to reward liars? Here is Heidi Montag putting on a stellar performance with “divorce papers” in hand at a Santa Monica courthouse. And it was only months after this event where she and Spencer came public about the fact that this divorce was a huge sham. And now well….it looks like these kids have some money problems on their hands. Shocking, we know. The couple – who recently rekindled their relationship after a fake separation in April – have squandered their $10 million fortune on renting a $35,000-a-month Malibu home, wasting $3 million on Heidi’s failed music career, six cars, private jets and the blonde beauty’s cosmetic surgery and are now faced with a $2 million tax bill they are unable to pay. Spencer said:

“We were immature, worrying too much about the famous part instead of the actual business part. In hindsight, we shouldn’t have spent any of our money. We should have been low-key and saved. We spoke with a bankruptcy attorney and I’ve looked into unemployment check.”

The pair have been left homeless and are now living in a studio apartment in the grounds of Spencer’s parents’ home. Spencer admitted to Life and Style magazine:

“I feel like I’m 14 years old again. My parents are my lifeline.” Heidi added: “Spencer’s parents go to the grocery store for us once a week and that’s all we get.”

Heidi admitted she even considered stripping for Playboy magazine before her husband’s parents gave them somewhere to live. She said: “At our lowest point, I considered posing for nude pictures in Playboy.” The pair blame their downturn in fortunes due the their reality TV show ‘The Hills’ suddenly being cancelled after four seasons, with the final series being shortened from 20 episodes to 10. Spencer explained: “We thought ‘The Hills’ was going to be like ’90210′ and we’d have another five to 10 years.

“The ratings were consistent. But we never saw ‘Jersey Shore’ coming. Before, TV audiences were fine with seeing us all argue, but now they want you to punch one another in the face and hook up with three different people. Our cast was a bit boring and snoozeworthy in comparison. No wonder we got cancelled.”

Despite their struggles, the couple insist they are not seeking sympathy. Spencer said: “We don’t want sympathy. We did this to ourselves and feel like idiots. But we’ve grown up and are definitely not as naive anymore.” At this point, it’s really….like REALLY…hard to believe a thing that either of them say. But if Spencer Pratt finally feels like the idiot that he is…well then, a little bankruptcy goes a long way.

Photograph: PacificCoastNews.com